The P word

Gone again...I'm sorry I'm currently only updating once a week...things are just crazy, hectic and unfortunately I have little to report.

I had a fabulous week last week, not Perfect but overall, pretty darn good. got in 5 workouts, over 3,000 cals burnt and am just overall pretty happy with my choices.

the elusive they say that every time you diet, you do things a little different so I'm trying to forget how easy it came to me last Fall and focus on today. Then and now are just so different, it wouldn't really be a proper comparison anyways.

so, I'm trying to set myself up for another productive week, where I hit my first major milestone (although I should know by now NOT to set weight goals) but c'est la vie.. it will give me something to work towards besides...

1. adding an extra mile to my running distance this week (up to 6 miles as of tomorrow!)
2. giving up my beloved CREAMER....

I love my creamer, it makes my coffee experience so amazing but truth: hydrogenated corn syrup is the first ingredient! how can I be eating non-processed crap and still be ok with drinking that!? now, I'm not going completely balls to the wall but instead only allowing it for the weekends as of now. I'm substituting half-n-half for the week. Two ingredients: milk and cream! Two days in and I'm surprsingly ok with it... not as bad as I thought but then again, I am making this decision because I want to not because I have to!

so yeah... that is what is up in my neck of the woods...how be you?!

Burned Out

i know, i know..  my posting has been beyond spotty.. I'm just burned out.

not just from blogging but also life. i havent had a vacation yet this year and due to all the deaths in the family, my dad's injury, Nate's insane travel schedule, we just havent been able to pick a date (although I think we finally have).

it's weird i would have never guessed how negatively its been impacting my life. i'm grouchy, negative, unhappy, angry, agressive and so beyond exhausted. i could sleep 12 hrs a day and it still not be enough.

so, lets talk about weight, or not. I've reached this new point in my life, where for once I am not obsessed with my weight, your weight, his weight, what she's eating, what your eating or even The Biggest Loser (although Ill watch it because too many peeps I know do), but it's not consuming me like it used to.

I just don't feel the need to talk about weight like I used to, maybe, because I'm letting go of the mentality that my weight defines me. My work has been a huge stressor on my life, and in the process of trying to change that, I'm filling my life with things I want to achieve and do and it's been exciting, exhausting, stressful, etc. but it's making me realize that my weight is not the end-all, be-all.

Yes, I am NOT happy with the scale right now, and yes, I'm working towards dropping the weight again, but I'm not sure how much I'm going to document about it. At least not these first few pounds.

This time has also given me a chance to reassess where I really want to be with my goal weight. 136 has always been THE number, but realistically, I don't think Ill be able to whittle down and stay there. I'm thinking 145 sounds good, but honestly if I could get to the low 50's again, I would be ecstatic, I felt great there and regret not taking better care of myself.

anywhoo... that's what I've been up to.. still chugging along...never giving up!

sex sells

sorry peeps, the title has nothing to do with my blog post but surprisingly enough, I always get a ton of hits when sex or anything sexual related is in the title! so... since your here, you may as well read my post! =)

man, anoher week bites the dust... but lately, I've been choosing to stay away.

I just sorta dont want to talk about my weight. Crazy I know, because who doesnt want to talk about their weight, right? It's also the first season I am not sitting by the TV waiting for TBL to start.

Im still going strong with my workouts, already have two in for this week so yay... GO ME!!! But the more difficult task now is getting my eating under control..this month included way too much dessert and my countertop is littered with to be recycled Wendy's Float cups. I'll get back to where I was, I have no doubt of that, my only concern is what is going to happen between now and then to derail that? I'm thinking, my vacation to Germany at the end of the month, you know, if my 'boss' comes back.

and in other, non-weight related news, my dad has returned to Walter Reed, so that's sorta nice. Unfortunately, on the same day that took place, we found out Nate's other grandpa passed away.

This has obviously been my year of funerals. Aren't you glad you stopped by?!

At least its Thursday, right?!

Ignorance is Bliss

I've been ignoring the scale for a damn week and although I am quite happy to not know the number, I know it's bad. I cant tell if my shirt or bra is tight and my pants, are a tad tight around my stomach as well, but the reality is, right now I cant be bothered to have my mood dampened by what the scale is going to say. Edited to add, I did step on the scale this morning, mainly because I felt like I looked HUGE yesterday... it wasn't nearly as bad as I had anticipated and have updated the sidebar accordingly.

Last week was just a poorly planned, emotional eating kind of week. Nothing around that, and as I pulled myself out of my puddle of tears, I entered into a fun food filled weekend. This week, well, any week that involves lots of eating out and once again poor planning on my part, could always be a better week.

I am  extremely busy... I've taken on some more responsibilities with my boss being out indefinitely, and school is eating up a lot of my work time. I'm loving taking on-line classes but there is much more busy work. I used to spend my days browsing the web, well now I'm doing the assignments. On top of that, this is the last week my dad's here visiting... and since we are still somewhat up in the air with his recovery, I'm trying to enjoy the time.

I thought I would mention this though, for those of you who read the fabulous Ms. BitchCakes (who reached LifeTime status with WWers yesterday) know she does PunkRope once a week in NYC. Well, I've been stalking the PunkRope site religiously waiting for them to come to MI, and two Sundays ago, I got to participate in a Punk Rope certification class...here's me with Tim and Shana...both awesome, awesome people!

so yeah...I hope that as of next week things calm down a tad but know I'm still fighting the fight every day.